Game Preview: Iowa

Somewhere near Iowa City...

The doorbell rings, Kirk Ferentz sets down his drink and pauses his VHS copy of Remo Williams:The Adventure Begins as he walks to the door. He opens the door and there stands Mark Dantonio. They shake hands, each trying to squeeze the other's hand more firmly and Ferentz invites him in. Ferentz invites Dantonio into the study, leatherbound copies of books like "What Color is Your Parachute?" and "Who Moved My Cheese?" line the walls. He motions for Mark to sit. Mark begins to sit and Ferentz says "AH! I did not say Simon Says."



Remo Williams'ed!

Ferentz pours himself a drink and then offers one to Dantonio. Dantonio accepts then Ferentz yells "NO DRINKING IN OUR HOUSE!". Ferentz throws the highballs against the walls and they smash littering glass all over all the room. "Remo Williams'ed!" Ferentz draws his gaze slowly to Dantonio and says "Do you know why I've invited you here tonight Mark?" Dantonio sensing mortal danger, quietly replies "No." Ferentz says, "Us Iowa fans hate you Mark Dantonio, Remo Williams hates you Mark Dantonio, do you know why we hate you Mark Dantonio?" Dantonio replies with the glare, but says nothing.



"Mark, you're here because you sir are a hypocrite. You claim to not poach other team's players and yet you came in and stole David Barrent right from our backyard?" Mark quietly replies, "Much like you stole Cedric Everson from ours on signing day? Or Mikail McCall last year?" Ferentz adds a shade of red and circles back around "What about letting Chris Rucker out of jail to play in the Iowa game? That's not exactly zero tolerance is it?" Mark sighs heavily and says "You're right Kirk, that was a mistake and I shouldn't have done it. Particularly since by the time he entered the game we were down 17-0. It was bad enough that I sacrificed my morals, but to sacrifice my morals and lose 37-6 was ridiculous." Ferentz leans back and and finishes his highball of scotch. He pours another and looks at Dantonio. "I think that's about it here Mark. We'll see you on the field Saturday. Let me walk you out." Ferentz finishes his drink and they walk out to the foyer.

Dantonio asks who the cab company is around Iowa City and do they have actual vehicles or do they use Chuckwagons? Ferentz replies "It's ok Mark, ole Remo, I mean uh, Kirk can give you a ride home." Together they climb in and Dantonio says "This is great, I have a copy of the Remo Williams TV show for you at the hotel, I forgot to bring it with me, now I don't have to bring it to the stadium on Saturday." Ferentz pulls up to the Motel 6 and right there are two of Iowa City's finest. Dantonio motions to them and they come over with a breathalyzer, Ferentz blows a .10, just like Rucker. Dantonio smiles and walks into the Hotel.

This blog has been getting a LOT of Iowa based traffic this week, it should be noted that I was not in favor of Rucker playing in the Iowa game last year. First offense was one thing, a second ZERO TOLERANCE offense is inexcusable. Further, I do not think drunk driving is funny. What I do think is funny is how completely up in arms much of the Iowa fanbase is about how thuggy our program is. It comes across as hating us for our freedoms.

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Iowa Passing Attack vs MSU Pass Defense



Iowa QB James Vanderbeek sits in third place on the Big Ten passing efficiency list. With an 18 TD to 4 INT ratio he represents as big a pocket challenge as Russell Wilson was. Making the task easier for our defense is that he can't run like Wilson can. Last week MarQueis Gray tore apart the MSU passing defense by hitting holes in the zone. On paper, our passing defense should have this under control and as long as the D doesn't get hung out to dry again, they will.

Advantage: MSU

Iowa Rushing Attack vs MSU Rush Defense

Iowa Running Back Marcus Coker has come on strong in the past few weeks averaging 174 yards and 2 TDs a game. He also appears to be the only dude carrying the ball. Our rushing defense has been holding rushing offense 80 yards under their season average in Big Ten play. So the real question becomes "Is 95 yards and a TD going to generate enough offensive production to beat MSU?" only Dr. Jekyll and Mr Cousins can really answer that.

Advantage: MSU

MSU Passing Attack vs Iowa Pass Defense

It will come as no surprise to MSU fans that here is where I get a bit nervy about Cousins. His road performances have never been stellar and particularly not against Cover 2 type defenses. Add to that three injured tight ends and well, this starts to look a bit more frightening. Still, Dantonio took the step of closing off player access this week to encourage time for Cousins to crawl out of his own head. But still, I need to see to believe.

Advantage: Iowa

MSU Rushing Attack vs Iowa Rush Defense

This isn't your typical Iowa rushing defense with the scary D-Line and NFL LBers in it. Which makes me hopeful. Still we are ranked dead last in rushing. Which makes me sad face.

Advantage: Iowa

Overall: Iowa has lost both of it's trophy games this year and does not play Wisconsin. So I took the liberty of creating one for both of our teams. Hopefully, this will aid MSU in their quest.



MSU hasn't won at Kinnick since 1989. That's a long time, my life in 1989 consisted of eating cheetos and playing Megaman 2. The combination of Iowa's rich tradition of whipping our ass in Iowa and Cousin's road nerves do not give me confidence in winning this game, despite the fact it is winnable. So, we'll hope for the best and prepare for the worst.

MSU 17 Iowa 28.

Editor's Note: I kept accidently typing 38 instead of 28. Hope that's not a bad sign.

Iowa: Friday Morning Youtubin'!

Normally this is where I show a bunch of videos of us beating up on the opposing team, but seriously let's kick these guys asses. If I have an axe to grind with anyone it's Iowa.









And for all the whining about Iowan Dantonio Impropriety

Kirk Ferentz: The Nemesis of Mark Dantonio?

In Iowa City, there lives a man. His name is Kirk Ferentz and he is the Head Coach of the Iowa Hawkeyes. After four years of watching this man in relation to our coach Mark Dantonio I have come to an indisputable conclusion. Kirk Ferentz's purpose in life is to shit in Mark Dantonio's cereal.

Last year was of course the most severe example with MSU losing 37-6 and Ferentz gleefully rubbing his nose in it. You know, as much as he gleefully does anything. In the video below, he cites the excellence of a play made by his team in this 37-6 blowout as payback for the "Hook and Lateral" that Michigan State ran against them in 2009.



You know, he was paying back Michigan State for making their 2009 game close. Maybe it wasn't satisfying enough for him to grow 70,000 arms and punch everyone in the gut as the clock expired in 2009. Seriously, what the hell kind of comment is that? The kind you deliver when you just drop the hammer on someone.

In 2008, MSU carries a 13-3 lead in at the half and is a 4th and 2 stop of Iowa's Shonn Greene away from losing at the end of the game. In 2007, we lose out in double overtime in a game we took right down to the wire. (Side Note: I watched that game in the Capital City airport bar with Tom Izzo.)

It's not that Ferentz beats MSU, it's that when he does beat MSU my blood hurts afterwards at the fashion in which the beating occurred. It's because of this that I find myself wondering if Kirk Ferentz is the nemesis of Mark Dantonio.

One Step Ahead

Ferentz and Dantonio share the mantra of playing football traditional Big 10 football with a focus on high percentage passes, minimizing turnovers and stifling defense. The problem is that in this match-up so far, Ferentz has totally outdueled Dantonio in these areas. The only time we won the turnover battle? When we won in 2008. How many times have we outrushed Iowa in this series? Zero. Even in 2008 win, they outgained us in total yardage and time of Possession. Why did we win that game they turned the ball over three times, we turned it over one. It's becoming clear that when Ferentz and Dantonio get themselves together in the yard, Ferentz beats Dantonio at his own game.

How And Why Is This Year Different?

There are two teams that control their own destiny in the Legends division. They are playing in Iowa City on Saturday. As a result, Iowa is getting the red-letter game treatment this week. Dantonio has closed off player access from the media for the second time this year. The first was against Ohio State who is apparently a much better team than we all thought they were after that game. Of course MSU has to win every game in November to have the opportunity to play for the Rose Bowl, but no remaining game will be more difficult than this Saturday's game in Iowa City.

Is there an analog for this season's game

Actually, yes. I'm glad you asked. This game actually reminds me a bit of the 2009 MSU-Iowa game. Iowa had a stifling defense, an at times baffling quarterback and was on their fourth string running back. MSU was having a disappointing season and struggled with losses in games they probably should not have lost. This game is mildly different in that 2011 Iowa is better than 2009 MSU was, but the stakes for 2011 MSU are equally as high they were for 2009 Iowa.

How Can Ferentz Foil Dantonio This Year? (Aka cause Mark Dantonio to say "I'll GET YOU NEXT TIME GADGET!!!!")

Simple. If he beats Dantonio on Saturday, goes on to lose a game to Nebraska, letting Nebraska back into the B10 title game and securing a bowl berth for MSU somewhere tepid in January like Tennessee. If this happens, next year this article will be titled Kirk Ferentz: The Man Who Ruins My Happy Times.

Progress by Stagnation

Michigan State football was the beneficiary of a quirk of college football physics: progress through stagnation.  Thanks to Northwestern’s Pyrrhic (Persahic?) victory over Iowa, the Hawkeyes fell out of the Rose Bowl race.  By not playing at all, the Spartans emerged unscathed past another week of Big Ten competition—and unless they pratfall at home against Purdue, should do so again this weekend.  Further, the one team who has a lead on MSU in the Rose Bowl race will have to leap a much higher hurdle: Iowa, whose defeat of MSU and subsequent loss to Northwestern put us all in this mess to begin with.

I’m usually one of those obnoxious people who parses common sports phrases for their actual meaning—so when talking heads on TV talk about receivers “catching the ball at its highest point,” I chuckle at the mental image of a guy launching himself fifteen feet in the air to nab a skinny post at its apogee.  But the other day, I caught The John Kincade Show, and Kincade sussed out one I’d never thought of: “controlling your own destiny.”  It’s completely impossible to “control” your destiny!  If it is truly Michigan State’s destiny to play in the Rose Bowl, if it is written in the stars, then it IS going to happen; we’re all just along for the ride.

What of it, then?  Is it already a fait accompli?  If I could get my hands on Biff’s Sports Almanac, would I see Michigan State in Pasadena this year (A: no, it only ever went up to 2000)?  Honestly, I think the opportunity will be there.  All season long I’ve had a weird itch, an inkling, a hunch that Ohio State would trip up at the end of the season.  My hunch was that it would be Michigan doing the tripping; after all the hullaballoo surrounding the Wolverines this year, wouldn’t that just beat all?  Better yet, it would cinch immediate Coach-For-Life-Until-We-Get-Really-Sick-of-Scoring-Fifty-Points-a-Game-and-Winning-Eight-Games status for Rich Rodriguez.  However, if it’s to be Iowa—who’s been in the business of making and unmaking seasons of destiny this year—then that’s fine with me, too.

The question: even if the path is clear, can the Spartans walk down it?  Even if the enemy is waylaid for them, can they claim their prize?  Even if all they have to do is walk into Happy Valley and walk out victors, can they pull it off?  Ah, that’s a question for next week.  This week, the task is simple: win by not-losing, for the third week in a row—and let the stars choose whom they will.