Conference Reshufflin' is as American as Apple Pie

When Conference USA and Mountain West announced their intent to merge on Monday, they made a promise of mediocrity to America in the way that only Conference USA and the Mountain West can.

The structure of the new conference, Smatresk and Cowen's statement said, will have a "national scope from the Atlantic Seaboard to Hawaii, regular season scheduling in divisions, NCAA FBS affiliation and mechanisms to emphasize and improve academic standards and fiscal responsibility."

I think could be more accurately phrased as:

So we were worried our terrible football conferences would die to death of mediocrity. With Boise State, TCU and BYU all leaving for greener pastures the chance of having a national presence in the sphere of mediocrity was diminishing. We felt it was necessary to merge in order to continue the fine tradition of nationally pedestrian football.

Between the two conferences they return seven teams next season with winning records. If you take them and another three teams, you might MAYBE have a decent football conference. What they're choosing to do is to take all of the good teams and all of the bad, 'til death or more dollars do you part. Instead, it'll be like a fine layer of crap smeared too thin all over the United States and Hawaii. Only Alaska is spared from this mess and have you seen When Mooses Attack? I'd rather deal with boring football.

Yet, while the quality of the game might not ever exceed Caffeine-Free Diet Coke, they've stumbled on an idea that might be very interesting in execution.

The new conference will consist of 18 to 24 members and start in the 2013-14 academic year. It would not only have a conference championship football game, but also conference semifinals. Conference USA and the Mountain West would continue as is for the 2012-13 season.

This new conference, the USA Confest we can call it for now, has decided it's place in the pecking order and it's not with the BCS big kids. So they're going to go off and secede and start their own system that has a "Plus-One" playoff right inside their own conference. Could the plan be to try and create a system for the non-BCS kids that creates a four or eight team playoff system independent of the BCS? That's so damn AMERICAN it just might work.

One thing is certain. With Delany talking playoffs and the USA Confest talking conference playoffs, the days of a playoff free college football landscape are drawing to a close. The risk-averse computer programmer in me worries that the new landscape will be too devoid of anything resembling a rivalry game. That every game will become a Michigan State vs. generic-team-to-be-named-later-with-a-varying-level-of-goodness. But the person in me who watched Boise State vs Oklahoma a few years ago is hopeful that this change will be good.

PSU: The Opinion Post I've Tried Not To Write

I've tried for 48 hours not to write this post, but it's getting to the point now where I feel like I have to. It's bothering me not to write this post. It should be noted though as an MSU blogger I have no stake in the matter or relevance for that matter. Just a guy with a browser tab and an opinion.

The story coming out of Penn State over the weekend is sad and terrible. You can read about them on the front page of CNN. The short version is that Jerry Sandusky, Joe Paterno's Defensive Coordinator of 23 years, sexually assaulted eight boys between 1994-2009. After this was reported to Athletic Director Timothy Curley and Gary Schultz the School's VP of Finance and Dodge Stratus Driving in 2002. Both men resigned their positions last night.

Curley and Schultz "allegedly failed to report the sexual assault of a young boy after the information was brought to their attention, and later made false statements to a grand jury that was investigating a series of assaults on young boys," Pennsylvania Attorney General Linda Kelly said over the weekend.

If true, this is the single worst cover-up that we know of in NCAA Football history. I worry that there is too much hyperbole in the previous sentence, I also worry there is not enough. In a cursory search of the googles all the worst penalties have been applied to players getting paid, given free drugs, too many hookers, etc. All of those things are different, they involve grown people making choices to accept said money, drugs or professional services. The actions of Jerry Sandusky if true deserve the most stringent criminal punishment. I'm a parent and so are many people who read this, to do what he is accused of is unthinkable.

A great man once said "Losing a game is heartbreaking. Losing your sense of excellence or worth is a tragedy.", that man's name was Joe Paterno. I love Joe Paterno, he's not just the face of Penn State, he might well be the face of the whole Big Ten. "COME TO PENN STAAAAAAAAAAAATE" gets yelled in my house on a monthly basis. He became the winningest coach in NCAA history just a couple of weeks ago and it couldn't have happened to a more outwardly deserving man. As a person he's one of the most generous coaches in the NCAA. He takes a low salary and donates a significant portion back to the school in the form of academic scholarships annually. As a casual Penn State fan, I'm sure that he participates in many more charitable endeavors.

That's why it kills me to write that if these allegations are true, he has to go. A person might not be able to prove whether he knew anything about this or not, for my own part I simply cannot believe you could work with someone for 23 years and not know about this. Joe Paterno is nobody's fool and certainly not the fool of a member of his inner circle. I honestly hope he could leave without having his legacy forever stained, but I doubt it. If Jim Tressel gets fired for lying about his players taking money, weed and cars, Joe Paterno has to go for this. I hate writing that sentence, but it's true.

As a football program, I don't know how PSU survives this. If this happened at Michigan State, I don't think I could root for MSU in any sort of financially supportive way ever again. I'd be upset that this happened at MSU, but only because it happened anywhere. A certain percentage of the population are pederasts, it's disgusting but true, and Penn State happened to draw the short straw on having this college coach be one at their school. What would set it over the top for me is that there was an active effort to prevent that information getting out into the community. That school would lose my trust permanently.

Finally, if these allegations are true, PSU needs to have NCAA punishments applied that are as harsh as any I can recall in my lifetime. I cannot think of a punishment that fits the crime right now, mostly because I cannot wrap my head around the alleged crime at this point. But the point is this, people who are critical decision-makers at Penn State allegedly covered this story up to protect the Penn State football program. The penalty for this needs to be so harsh that no other institution would ever consider doing the same. It's terrible that it happened, it's unforgivable that it was covered up.

Michigan State: A Power Running Team?

So yesterday I got all "get off my lawn you damned whippersnappers" about the lack of identity within the Michigan State offense. I recanted a better time in 2007 when MSU converted all of it's third downs by running the ball down the opposition's throat. It seems unfair to level this criticism without some research to back it up.

I tried to think of a question that would provide a strong indicator to what the "identity" of an offense is and landed on this one. Since 2007, on 3rd and 4th down with 3 or fewer yards to go, what type of play does Michigan State run and how often is it successful? If you believe in your running game, I think this is a makeable down and distance. If you are skittish about your running game, I think this you'll see a lot of passing.

The stats were constructed taking the results of plays on 3rd and 4th down with 3 or less to go. They were only taken in Big Ten games to try and remove some of the fluff in non-conference games. Results are tabulated using ESPN play-by-play. Note: Discovered cfbstats about seven seconds ago, will probably use that in the future. The stars indicate a missing game. In 2007 it was Indiana, in 2008 it was Wisconsin, in 2009 it was Minnesota. An obvious issue is small sample size. 20 or 30 of something over 8 games is not really a lot. Second issue is that we've played the meat of our schedule in 2011 so there will be some fluff going forward or at least, I hope so.



So what does this tell us?

- First, I was half right about 2007. When we ran we converted 80 percent of our third and shorts in 2007, but we didn't run as often as I remembered. We only ran 45 percent of the time on 3rd and short in 2007 we just happened to be successful nearly every time.

- Next, MSU is having it's worst 3rd down rushing conversion percentage of the Mark Dantonio era in 2011. Again, this might be because we've played the meat of our schedule and things should only get easier from here. Also, our offensive line is not bad, but not the manbeasts we were expecting by year 5. With the exception of 2009 we haven't had a year below 58 percent. This year we're at 33 percent.

- I think the sheer number of 3rd and shorts is important too. In 2007 MSU had 33 3rd and shorts, in 2010 it was 29, in 2008 it was 26 and 2011 is projecting 26, in 2009 we had 16.

In these situations, we've run more than passed in 2008, 2009 and 2010. In 2007 we passed more than ran. In 2011, we have yet to play three spread teams with weak rushing defenses and Iowa, who's down, but still Iowa. I suspect the balance will end up at the end of the Big Ten season slightly in favor of rushing over passing.

So in this particular metric is Michigan State a power running team at least in terms of play selection? For the last three years and projected over this year, yes, anywhere from marginally (2008 and 2011) to definitely (2009 and 2010). The question might instead be after 2007's third and short success on third down, should we be?

Anyway, leave comments or areas for improved study below, stats was a long time and many hoppy beverages ago

Nebraska Recap: An Offensive Look in the Mirror

Michigan State has not had an offensive identity since 2007 with Ringer and Caulcrick. In 2007, you knew what was coming, running on running downs, passing on passing downs. 3rd and 3 meant a run of some sort, we go for it on 4th and 1. And you know the hell what? We averaged 33 ppg that year. There was none of this flim-flam about trying to fake people out with pass plays on running downs. It was kept simple, KISSed even.

On Saturday, MSU had two runs on third down, both successful. One was a designed run on 3rd and 2, the other a broken play Cousins scramble for a first down. The remaining 12 third down attempts were pass attempts. I don't have time to pull together all of the 3rd and shorts from this season, but how many times have we gone 5 wide on 3rd and short this season? More than two or three? Then it's too many. How many times have we lined up to run right on a critical third down to toss misdirection and run to the weakside?

I don't mean to get after Roushar about this, this was happening in a more controlled fashion under Treadwell too. Roushar had a bad day at the office on Saturday, I've had them, you've had them, that's fine. He hasn't been an OC since 2004, I bet there's a learning curve on that. This offensive identity crisis is something I've noticed for a while now and just had enough of this weekend.

So why mess with what's mostly working? Well, we're off to Iowa in 2 weeks. A place we haven't won a game since back when Jebediah Springfield settled Iowa City back in 1407. Our coaches need to put our players into a position to run for five yards on First Down and say "Hi, I'm Edwin Baker, I'll be running the ball down your damn throat for the next three hours." If we win at Iowa, I think we go to the B1G Title Game. SO WE HAVE TO WIN AT IOWA.

Fix the run game, rather, make the run game something to be feared and respected. It will make our offense something to be feared and respected. If you don't know who you are, how are you going to tell them who just whupped them up?

End Rant.

PS Congrats to Will Gholston on his 15 tackles and 2 sacks and whatever. He's dreamy.

Rant: Bret Bielema

The following is a rant directed at Bret Bielema. I loathe him completely and totally for reasons even I don't understand. The below may contain swearing that might make a sailor blush. If you're sensitive to that sort of thing, do not read the below post.

Side note, I actually wrote this during Michigan week while I was killing time, so some of the things are future tense. What is not however is that Bielema is a choker.

Here's a BieLOLema while you think it over.



Thank you Black Heart Gold Pants love your blog, hate your coach.

You're still here? Good. Let's begin.

After Ty's remarkable missive on Juggalos and Walverines last week, it seems only fitting that we play Wisconsin this week. At Wisconsin, even the marching band are a bunch of meatheads. Who has a marching band get suspended for a game? Wisconsin, that's who. Who has a fan base that harasses Tom Osborne and his merry band of nonagenarians? Wisconsin, that's who. Who has a tradition of taking some of America's Whitest Kids and having them dance to one of the top hip-hop songs of the 90s?



Wisconsin, That's Who.

So it should come as no surprise to you that in 2005 when it came time to look for his replacement, Barry Alvarez was no fool. He wanted a known quantity, a populist hero, a meathead he could rely on and Bret Bielema was the perfect man for the job.



First off, look at the guy. He looks like a fat gym teacher who hangs out at an old folks home looking for a date. He looks stupid. He's also a reggae guy, I remember an interview with a recruit that talked about him groovin' on Marley to impress a recruit and thinking "What a doosh.", but in fact:

MADISON, Wis. — Sitting in his cavernous office that overlooks Camp Randall Stadium, island reggae music growling on a stereo system, Wisconsin head football coach Bret Bielema laughs and recalls an assistant's first trip to a local supermarket.



The Truth Hurts Sometimes

Second, the windbreaker. He wears that stupid damned windbreaker around like it's going to get him enshrined at the College Football Hall of Fame. "Here is the bronzed windbreaker of Bret Cornelius Bielema, he wore this windbreaker whilst dispatching UNLV in 112 degree weather 73-20, flew home and won a Deep Fried Cheese Curd eating contest while doing a keg stand." I understand the need to brand yourself as a coach these days. Spurrier with his fabulous visor, Sweatervest, Pete Carroll with sunglasses and cheating. I guess in fairness Windbreaker might have been the only cold weather item left, but you could brand yourself by winning.

Oh wait, he has branded himself by winning. Like an asshole. Bret Bielema hung 70 on Austin Peay and 83 on Indiana in 2010. Wisconsin basketball only scored 83 three times last year. Sure you can say, it's not Bret Bielema's job to keep Wisconsin out of the opponent's endzone. You are entitled to that opinion, just like I am entitled to the opinion Bielema is a dickbag. I have to imagine last year when he lost to TCU in the Rose Bowl, people were like "Bret, you failed to run enough when you had success with Montee Ball early on? What happened?" He was like: "Hurr, I am a banana. Scoring 70 on Austin Peay helped us get here but NOT scoring 91 is probably what kept us from knowing how to finish. I need some beer."

Finally, if you're going to go to the Rose Bowl instead of us, despite us beating you head-to-head. Run the damned ball when you're having success on a defensive line 60 lbs smaller than yours. When your backs are averaging 5.8 per carry, run the damn ball. This is the most important piece of all as to why I hate Bret Bielema, he can't close. In 2008, the clock was winding down in East Lansing, we had to hurricane kick with :02 seconds left to go, and he called a timeout to "ice the kicker". Swenson made the field goal and Spartans win. The guy can't close, because he's slow. A point further proved in 2011 East Lansing.

So there you have it, meathead of the people, branding himself for what purpose no one is really sure, no cupcake left behind and not a good coach in crunch time. I loathe Bret Bielema for all of these reasons and probably some more, but most of all despite all of these things he has the most successful team in the Big Ten the past 5 years. The luckiest doosh in the big ten. See you in Indy for the Big Ten Title Game.